"Its called the Octagon, but I also nick named my testes, my left one is James Westfall and my right one is Doctor Kenneth Noisewater" - Brian Fantana

During my absence from my blog I have been thinking rather hard on material to use and I have come up with a ton of stuff, but the problem is I want to space it out as to give everyone great, amazing reading material every day of the week. Hopefully I will be able to ration it out without my thoughts becoming weak and meaningless.

On to my first topic and this is dear to my heart, but has anyone actually seen this before? Here is the website... http://therealrandymoss.com/rmoss/mask.html

How friggin' creepy is that? I look at and just think of anytime I've ever seen people use those presidential masks to rob banks, people, and etc. Soon we will have a crime wave of Randy Moss look-a-likes. Hell Randy Moss himself could probably join in on it and claim that "Man that isn't me, I mean look at it, that's a mask man!" He could get away scott free. People could also try to us it to frame Randy as well. A white guy about 5'8" or so wouldn't be able to pass for Randy Moss though I mean come on... I thought about buying one of those though and using it for Halloween this year, but decided against it as I've decided to go as Johnny Human Torch or Invisible Pedestrian. The Human Torch is nothing, but a bunch of oily rags and a lighter... I get to yell the word's FLAME ON once in my life and then die... how cool is that. Invisible pedestrian is almost as good. I'd be dressed in black from head to toe and then walk on sidewalks, driveways, streets, and etc taking my life into my own hands. Man I could make some monster cash that way though... suing whoever hit me. I'd have a few broken bones, but hey if that’s the price then so be it.

Today I had to get up early though to see my Grandmother and my Aunt off as my dad took them back to Houston. Well after all that I went to the TV; mind you I'm never up this early... I don't even know what is on. I'm looking through the guide button and what do I see? Boston Public. I watched that show almost religiously for the first season. There was always some weird ass crap happening on that show, whether is was a teacher throwing down a gun on his desk, an old moron who claimed that women should wear bras for the betterment of the country because they distract men and cause them unwanted attention and cause them to not be equal, to a teacher having sex with a student (the original bitter beer face dude from the Keystone Commercials!!!!) It was like a version of The O.C. only like 4 years earlier and the people that were the main focus are the teachers. The really hot one was on Nip/Tuck and she was the girl that would have "sex blackouts" and just go mad with dudes all over the place. She was freaking hilarious, but scary at the same time.

That was an interesting transition... go from talking about family to being here to about shows with deteriorating family values. Damn isn't life just fun!!

Next will be a topic that other probably won't care about, but I need time to vent. I sat and watched a bunch of morose mofo's play to the absolute bottom of the barrel and get the crap kicked out of them. Yes that’s correct, my beloved Chiefs played like ass and looks like my "Chiefs SB baby... you heard it here first" has its first chink in the armor. First you have two jackasses at the LT and RT in Bober and Black, they are literally useless... they got beat like rented mules by the Denver DL. Then our 34 year old QB decided to have the worst performance of his in a Chiefs uniform. His passes were either 3 feet behind, ahead, high, or low... causing a terrible day for the receivers. However when he did get it on target the morons seemed to drop it (Unless it was the unfathomable Tony G or Eddie Kennison). Currently that makes Denver the current leader in the AFC West with at 2-1 record and a 2-0 record in the conference... where as the Chiefs are 2-1 with a 1-1 record in the conference. They play the Philadelphia Eagles this week so they better pull their head out of their ass or they are gonna get murdered again.

Well I started this at 3:11am and now it is 4:53am... yeah I get easily distracted.

Later mofo's... later.

"See if you can guess what I am right now... (punches cheeks)... I'm a zit, get it?" - John Belushi aka Bluto

Well once again my I forget to post for a few days... keeping those loyal viewers from reading my rantings. I'm so ashamed of myself for that, I should never shelter my thoughts from the world.

Today I woke up and had a good idea and had it in my head and kept repeating it so I wouldn't forget it, but guess what... when I was in the shower I completely forgot. I've been so pissed all day for forgeting it that I almost jammed bamboo shutes under my finger nails, but then realized that would do crap and I'm not big on pain except of course when I've been given a crap load of drugs like codine and etc.

I did go out and get The Longest Yard today, but naturally it is 430am and I have yet to watch it. Basically I'll probably remember I got it sometime this weekend, but I need to start studying for my GRE exam that I'm taking next Wednesday. Need to get my score up to atleast 550 on verbal. I'd tell you what I got the first time, but I'm pissed at my score. My writing was a 4.5 and my quantitative part was 590, so basically all I need to do is raise my verbal which if you know me will be a hard process. I can write and write and have it kick some ass but when it comes to the vocab, association crap, reading I seem to lack the general skill. Sad considering my ACT in english was higher than my math (34 for english and 33 for math). Amazing what both college and things of a liquid variety can do to your, or in my case, my mad english skills.

Well I'm gonna get the hell off this damn thing. I have to get up kinda soon, ok I'm lying I get up whenever I want as long as I'm at work by 12-1pm. Currently I'm actually writing a script for my E! True Hollywood Story of the McDonald's Gang. When I'm finished I'll probably post it on something and let y'all have a link to read it and tell me what you think.

Later mofo's... later.

"So, Lone Star, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb." - Dark Helmet

I can't get over the ESPN's hard-on for Randy Moss... why on earth do you have to say his name or what he can do ever freaking 15 seconds? Here's how it goes down...

Mike Tirico: Randy Moss randy moss randy moss randy moss.
Sterling Sharpe: That's right Mike, and Randy Moss randy moss randy moss randy moss.
Mike Tirico: Good point as well Sterling.

I mean did he just walk up to them and slip them a stack of 100 dollar bills or did he have some "fun" with them in the locker room before the game with no one watching? I hate the Raiders more than any sports team on this earth, more than the damn Yanks and that is saying something. I conisder the Yanks to be the anit-christ which I guess makes the Raiders a substitute devil or something.

Does anyone thing that a E! True Hollywood Story about Hamburglar would be the most interesting damn thing on the planet? Man I would show how he was a crack addict after he was arrested and charged by Mayor McCheese. Then his prison experiences with the "fry girls" who were actually dudes. He could then claim to have found god and entered the priesthood only to find out that molesting the fries and hamburgers is wrong and then have himself get banished and then live on the streets until Ronald finds him and beats the crap out of him and leaves him for dead. Thus allowing him to sue Ronald and then start up his own chain of burger joints that they lace the buns with crack so he could then steal all of Ronald's business. Then he could get caught again, but only get a slap on the wrist because he is freaking loaded and serves no time... only community service.

Does that sound cool to anyone else????

Well I'm off to finish some emails and figure out what the hell is going on with my letters of rec. from my teachers and my boss for my graduate school applications.

Later mofo's... later.

"My face doesn't hurt here or here so much, but right here..." - Tommy Boy

Well today I slept past my alarm, but still managed to get to the press conference in time. I wore what I had been to pretty much everyone since I started and my boss told me "Thanks for dressing up." Not sure where that came from and don't care, but it puzzles me, but then again most people don't get him. He's a tad off sometimes. I'm a guy, I grab stuff and go I'm not the woman trapped in a man's body metrosexual moron... I'm a shorts, sandals, and shirt guy, nothing fancy unless the occasion calls for it.

I'm bored out of my freaking mind which is never good cause then my mind begins to wonder so be on the look out for something weird tomorrow as it is sure to come out soon.

I didn't sleep sunday night or monday night as I was watching Lost Season 1 and that show freaking rules. It is like crack only you can't OD on it, doesn't suck all the money out of the bank, and doesn't dwindle in supply after awhile. Cheap alternative people... I know you all have tried "ice" a few times, I'm a smack fan myself, but we will save that for another day.

Well I'm gonna try and sleep tonight... hell I took a swig of my hydracodine bottle and should be out by now, but nothing is happening... it better freaking work thats all I'm saying.

Later mofo's... later

"In the year 2000.... Charmin will be forced to create a new 10 ply toilet paper after Taco Bell introduces its new Diarreto Supreme" - Andy Rictor

Tonight was a great night... I found a cd going through all this crap in my room that has a bunch of old Conan O'Brien bits on it. The quote above was part of the In The Year 2000 when Andy Rictor was a guest. If y'all missed last nights Conan you need to check it out at 6pm (Central) on MSNBC... "Clutch" was quite funny as they had both Bush and Clinton on.

I went to the dentist today during work and was bored out of my freaking mind. When I first got there I already knew this was a "hangout" for the female variety. I walked in and all the magazines were of the redbook, cosmo, and etc type crap. The damn television was set to "Guiding Light" and the ladies running the check-in kept poking her head out the window to see what was happening. After I was finally called (15 min late) I went back and my mouth about hit the floor... the 3 ladies I saw in the back cleaning teeth were all hot as hell and southern girls so they had that "twang" in their voice. I went into my room and sat down... the redhead from the back came into my room and went about her process of the crap she has to do. I talked when I didn't have x-ray stuff in my mouth, but when she was cleaning them I made her laugh so much that she had to stop twice. The entire time I was having to try and keep focused and not let my eyes wonder. After she was finished the actual dentist walked in... holy crap. The lady looked like she was maybe 28 or so and was the best looking one of the bunch. With the dental assistant I felt like I had been taken out to dinner and invited in for coffee... with the dentist I felt like I was used and abused with this lady... she went "tap tap tap" some teeth and looked with that mirror thing and was done, but did tell me that I had terrific spacing... boo yaa.

Well it is 5:12am as I finish this... I need to learn to open this damn thing and just type instead of getting distracted and doing something else. Well I'm off to pass out again.

Later mofo's... later.

"Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa..." - Prior to anything Matthew McConaughey ever says.

Well hello once again the few of you that are reading this. Today I have a few random ass things for your viewing pleasure.

Have you ever walked into a McDonald's restaurant and thought you yourself where the hell is Ronald? I don't give a crap if that guy were to get beat up by every freaking kid that walked through the door, every McDonald's should have their own in house Ronald. I remember when I was a kid I would go to Chuckie Cheese and see the stuffed mouse or what ever the hell he was there all the time. On my 10th birthday we went there and Bob Holmes and I stepped on his tail and tore it straight. Granted I realize that Ronald doesn't have anything this amusing, but he does have those big ass clown shoes. Plus think about it... people take pictures with the statue Ronald's doing all sorts of stuff, some of the risque variety... think of how funny it would be with a real life person.

If you had to chose who is the weirdest looking dude in a beard and etc would you pick Jake "The Snake" Plummer (QB for Denver) or Ricky Williams (RB for Miami)? I would have to go with Ricky cause he just looks freaking retarded. I look at him and see holes in spots all over his face. It looks as if he got bored and decided to shave a spot here and there or he has had a nasty case of moths living in his beard and then eating his hair... you make the decision. I will have to give credit to Surajit for coming up with the subject, but I took it a bit further.

Currently I'm watching Sahara instead of sleeping, but then again what else is new? Well it is 2:02 in the am and your watching Perspectives... anyone else remember that skit off SNL? I loved that damn thing, Tim Meadow's is like "How does it feel to break the color barrier" and the dude would respond with "I didn't... Jackie Robinson did, it's not possible to do it again." So he's like "I guess that means it was tough, but very rewarding." SNL was a great show back in the day, when they had Dana Carvey, Mike Meyers, Chris Farley, Phil Hartman, Kevin Nealan, Rob Schnieder, Adam Sandler, Chris Rock, Tim Meadows, David Spade, and etc. One of my favorite commercials they created was Big Red. Gigantic freaking Viking that you "pour in the goop in the helmet thing... but you better watch out, cause when you pull the ssssttttrrrriiinnnggg... BIG RED BIG RED." All he did was shoot red dye out of his head and it would stain everything in sight. Naturally the family was in an all white home (chairs, clothes, walls and etc). At the end they said "Big Red, from the makers of Termite Town... Clean up kit sold sep." Well guess what the clean up kit was... a drum of turpintine and gloves.

Well I'm gonna finish this up and hopefully pass out... have to work tomorrow and go to some dumb ass meeting in the afternoon for something that I have no clue what is the point.

Later mofo's... later.

"I'm Connor McCloud of the Clan McCloud" - Christopher Lambert

Well, well, well... it has been a number of days since I last put something on here. I haven't done much of anything lately, pretty much just working and getting crap ready for our first football this season. Tomorrow and Tuesday I need to get everything ready to edit and then combine for the Baylor Hall of Fame induction for Gary J. Kinne (LB from the Mid-Late 80s). He played with Baylor All-Americans Santana Dotson, James Francis, Blackmon, and Ray Crockett.

I went to the volleyball tourny here at Baylor that I was supposed to run and guess what... the computer crashed so I couldn't do anything. My parents hadn't gotten rid of the SMU ticket yet so I was able to go. Got to see Baylor get their first road win in quite sometime. That was one ugly ass game too... Baylor should have had an open field slaughter on them... Bell had INT's twice inside the 30 yard line... we fumbled a punt and also went for it on 4th down (it was 4th and 1 and we went for a pass, but only sent one guy downfield, what the hell was that about I don't know). We should have had 24 more points and they got an easy ass TD with about 15 sec to go too.

Well considering I started this damn thing at 1130pm and now it is 330am I think I'm gonna stop... what I get I guess when I start watching Shawshank and some other movie after it.

Word mofo's... word.